Thursday 13 August 2009

BTW – Firm Foundations


Did you know it was World Underwear Day yesterday…on 12 August? So, darling, what did you wear?

Madam herself has problems on a day-to-day basis organizing matching foundations. I am not disciplined nor extravagant enough to buy matching pairs each time,….and what if I want to put on a dark bottom and light coloured top? We can’t go panda bear through a white shirt, can we? Mother of all faux pas! And indeed, I was once again mismatched yesterday, seeing through World Underwear Day with nary a parade.

But conversations among friends have revealed that many of us are similarly challenged with this issue of colours and hues on a daily basis. (The small blessing is that at least we have a spectrum of colours enough to be mismatched!) A friend did say once that she kept away from colours and styles – save for the most conventional – as she was troubled by what the maid might think amid doing the laundry. So I will hazard to guess that G-strings and T-backs will not be part of her repertoire. In fact, as you will see in our little chat with lingerie expert in the story below, most women in our vintage go for pieces with more fabric.

But freshly post-World Underwear Day, I ask, must it be? At the halfway mark of one’s expected lifespan, is one waiting for the BIG 50 to venture into adventurous undergarments? Not long ago I pottered out to procure some to experiment with. To cut a long story short, flossing from G-strings was unbearable, inconceivable as a piece of clothing to don daily and for me, an unthinkable prospect. Boy shorts were even more uncomfortable. But interestingly, T-backs were great. Highly comfy, and a boon for travelling light (dries superfast, too), they come in all sorts of scintillating designs at places like Oohtique. Only thing is, you should wear it with skirts of heftier weight and length cos you don’t really want to go jiggling your buns down the street!...and oh yes, don’t get tangled in all the stringy bits.

I discovered some interesting stats too: 49% of women prefer panties, 28% thongs and 13% boyshorts. And adventures of all adventures!...6% prefer to go commando! And while we’re at it, might as well take a peek at the guys: 25% like boxers, 32% briefs, 28% boxer briefs…though I’ll be pretty suspicious of the 4% that do thongs and 7% go without. I’d say the 7% step into hazardous areas as those who didn’t get the snip risk getting zipped….and to extricate oneself, says a friend, is even more excruciating. Italians wear red, Argentineans wear pink, and Brazilians wear brand new underwear on New Year’s Eve…how about Singaporeans? Oh yes….boring beige?

Nay, tis time to sally forth and enhance one’s practical foundation wardrobe with colours, styles, fabrics, and liberalise oneself!!

But I digress. One thing Elaine and I were mulling over is…what is your underwear personality? We are great believers that what one wears is an extension of what one is. So with our amateur attempts, let’s try to navigate this maze of personality….

Grandma Undies – Don’t knock this one. People who still do Granny underpants these days in the face of all the variety available are probably individualistic and bold enough to disregard what others are marketing. So either they’re super conservative and stand firm, or closet glamour queens weighed down with luggage, waiting for to burst forth into self expression given half a chance and six months of sit ups.

Bikini Panties – Shall we guess that most of us fall into this category? Practical people comfy in our own skin, but still with a bit of raciness? Let us guess further – still buying Triumph brand, right? Since our secondary school days?

String Bikini – Yummy Mummy embroiled in practicality.

G-strings – Masochists and dentally obsessed who can’t floss enough.

T-Backs Minimalist babes who probably do some mean chandelier swinging in their off-time, former beach bunnies or former Granny Underpants.

Boy Shorts – Sporty girls, a little conservative but probably with a distinct funky side too. Bet they have short, chic hairstyles too.

Lace, flutter panties – These would be the romantic ultra feminine types I guess. Not totally practical (how do you stuff the extra cloth in jeans?) and loves Hello Kitty.

Are we right?

- Ee Waun

1 comments:

Anonymous said...

my all-time fave underwear is a pair of black on white (Friesian cow? Angus?) cow-print 100% cotton boxer-style boyshorts complete with faux buttons in front, with MAD COW stamped all round the elastic waistband. Well, if you can't seduce them w the booty, a little humour helps!

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